Thursday, April 16, 2009

What's Worse? Being Micro-Managed or Being a Cubs Fan?

This issue has been debated countless times (at least once) over the past 101 years...How would the majority of people prefer to be tortured---at work, having some asshole supervisor constantly looking over your shoulder for any possible flaw in your TPS reports...Or in your leisure time, watching the Cubbies play baseball during a typical season, which usually, for all practical purposes is "over" by the All-Star break, as they languish 9 games behind the Central Division leading Cardinals...or some other fluke team during that particular season.

Of course, there are pros and cons to consider for your particular preference for torture.  I've been micro-managed, but not for an entire lifetime.  Usually, a few years at a time is all I've had to endure.

The poor Cub fan has had to experience the emotional trauma of heartbreak, disappointment, or just plain disgust, every single year.  But, the "catch"---Once the pain and suffering for that recent season of futility ends, which usually coincides with Halloween, there's a period of recovery, where slowly but surely, false hope for "next year" starts to flash through even the most pessimistic Cub-olites.  The sad rationalization process begins..."If only Bartman would've gotten out of the way"..."If only Pujols played for us instead of them"..."If only that black cat wouldn't have jinxed us in '69"..."If only (insert pitcher's name) wasn't always getting hurt"...

And so it goes...Delusional rationalization.  However, at least there's that brief four to six month vacation from reality that rejuvinates those optimistic Chicago-land-olians to endure another inevitable season of torture.

If you're like 69% of American employees, your vacations from hell don't last that long.  Oh, you might take the family out to Wally World for a week or two, but let's face it...You can't get that pompous, back-stabbing so-called boss out of your head for more than a few minutes at a time, during any waking moments.  But then, you start thinking about the Cubs again...Is there no God?

Believe it or not, I really thought the Cubs were absolutely destined to win the World Series last year.  They not only had the best team in the National League...until the post-season began...They had that magical, incredible, and...weird 100 Year Anniversary thing going for them...Or so I thought.  Of course, I'm referring to the 1908 season, when the Cubs were the World Champions of the (smaller) baseball world.  Still they , were one of the greatest dead-ball era teams in history, and that ain't so bad...

Speaking of "dead balls", I remember the time my micro-managing boss...No, I can't say that on the air...There may be youths out there reading this bullshit.  Did I say that?  You bet I did, because "bullshit" s officially been accepted as a normal part of American business jargon...at least as far as I'm concerned...If memory serves me correctly, I use that word, or a simple variation of that word about fifty times in my book, Life Under the Corporate Microscope, by Larry Underwood.

Was that an overly blatant attempt at shamelessly self-promoting my book?  Well, I certainly hope so...I've got to do it, because I just realized the other day...Nobody else is willing to do it.  They've got more important things to worry about...Such as having a micro-managing boss from hell...Or being a Cubs fan.

The debate will never end.  I truly feel the pain for either sufferer, and had the horrible thought race through my head...What about the double agony of being micro-managed and being a Cubs fan?

My heart goes out to you all.  If you're being micro-managed, maybe your boss will get that well deserved promotion to a higher level of the corporate hierarchy where yowu won't be directly impacted by their idiocy...However, just hope they don't screw up the entire company by having too much influence.

Sadly, if you're a Cubs fan, forget about it.  They won't win the World Series again this year.  In fact, they won't even come close to making it to the World Series this year...or any year.  That's just the way it goes.  I don't make the rules.  I just report them, impartially, as any St Louisan would be inclined to do. 


However, if I'm wrong (rarely ever happens), I suppose I'll be happy for you.  Bye.

37 comments:

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